Failure To Launch

[Coley]

Originally Posted by mongocanfly

poor thing couldn't find his legos so he called the cops.....
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/06/01...ver-legos.html

That news made its way here as well....
I feel sorry for that man, again....this isn't really his fault but it now is his responsibility to deal with a life that he wasn't given the tools and upbringing to handle.
This is a pretty public case but believe me there are 100's of thousands of these guys (men) out there.
One day this will change when parents measure up and move away from following the collective.....but for the moment, it is avoided as a topic of conversation among most parents when their kids hit their 20's.

Hopefully, he finds a way to finally self determine.

Coley

[SCOTI]

I'm not sorry if any of you are offended but the blame is squarely on HIS shoulders & not his parents.

I didn't wan't anyone wiping my a$$ once I learned how to do it myself. I was just a kid but to allow someone to continue to do for you once you can do for yourself? That's on you. You create a life in this world yet declare you're not ready enough to provide for even your own basics? Pure selfishness.....

Shoving a young bird out of the nest is understandable & parents aren't blamed. Why isn't shoving an old one just as acceptable?

[special-K]

Originally Posted by SCOTI

Shoving a young bird out of the nest is understandable & parents aren't blamed. Why isn't shoving an old one just as acceptable?

I'm not offended, but I will point out where you are squarely wrong, since you asked. I see your statement as explaining the answer to you itself. The difference is the bird shoves it's young ones out at a particular phase of life that is crucial to their development. Once they can fly they need to start providing for themselves. It is that point in life the fledgling realizes that worm isn't going to keep showing up in momma's mouth, that if they want to eat they better go out and get it. Since humans are the only ones (some) who "hang on" to their young, we have no example of the bird that never left the nest. But what we would have is a Big Huey who is underdeveloped for his age. We get a guy like this one in the news.

It came to a court case 20 or so years after they had allowed this to go on. It is because of them allowing this to become his life as he knows it that it is now a problem for him. Like I said, it's hard to pull your hand back when it's being filled. Who would be the one to teach him the reasons he should pull his hand back if not his parents? I'll bet money that the parents will now be helping him with his bills in his new "separate location".

I know all this from first hand experience. My ex-wife is a coddler. It is one of the main reasons we are not together anymore. Once our kids came of age the problem became apparent. They didn't stay at home, but she tended to all their bills. It was causing us financial strain. I had my philosophy on how to raise kids and she had hers. I'd tell her she was creating a monster, setting them up for a rude awakening, that it is our job to help them "help themselves" not just help them. I'd tell her about Momma Bear running Baby Bare off after two years, Momma Bird kicking the fledgling out of the nest, and most of all... neither of our parents gave us a dime. We had to earn and make our own way and we were doing just fine!

[SCOTI]

Originally Posted by special-K

I'm not offended, but I will point out where you are squarely wrong, since you asked. I see your statement as explaining the answer to you itself. The difference is the bird shoves it's young ones out at a particular phase of life that is crucial to their development. Once they can fly they need to start providing for themselves. It is that point in life the fledgling realizes that worm isn't going to keep showing up in momma's mouth, that if they want to eat they better go out and get it. Since humans are the only ones (some) who "hang on" to their young, we have no example of the bird that never left the nest. But what we would have is a Big Huey who is underdeveloped for his age. We get a guy like this one in the news.

It came to a court case 20 or so years after they had allowed this to go on. It is because of them allowing this to become his life as he knows it that it is now a problem for him. Like I said, it's hard to pull your hand back when it's being filled. Who would be the one to teach him the reasons he should pull his hand back if not his parents? I'll bet money that the parents will now be helping him with his bills in his new "separate location".

I know all this from first hand experience. My ex-wife is a coddler. It is one of the main reasons we are not together anymore. Once our kids came of age the problem became apparent. They didn't stay at home, but she tended to all their bills. It was causing us financial strain. I had my philosophy on how to raise kids and she had hers. I'd tell her she was creating a monster, setting them up for a rude awakening, that it is our job to help them "help themselves" not just help them. I'd tell her about Momma Bear running Baby Bare off after two years, Momma Bird kicking the fledgling out of the nest, and most of all... neither of our parents gave us a dime. We had to earn and make our own way and we were doing just fine!

I'll bow out here. You won't convince me I'm wrong.

He's able to work.
He's able to father a child.
He's able to purchase things he wants.
He was able to spend ~9K storing inoperable vehicles vs. contributing that money toward his childs support (http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/mil...bfcL&ocid=iehp )

He just wants a free ride. He's lazy.

You're never too old to learn. He's now learning that luck can run out for anyone @ any time.

[Coley]

Originally Posted by SCOTI

He just wants a free ride. He's lazy.

Maybe....but in all likelihood, he wasn't born that way....its learned behavior.
Again, in all fairness...the parents own about 90% of this and as in Tim's case, it often starts with the Mom.

Backstory: I often mentor and work with young (20-ish) engineering grads and students so it is in my interest to read up and understand them and their habits and tendencies associated with this millennial demographic.
Over parenting, even in this advantaged group....is rampant unfortunately.
It isn't uncommon for a 20 year old (young) man to have his mom preparing and submitting his resume' for him....which makes some interviews, etc a little awkward, lol.

Coley

[Redneck Rydes]

" You get a go$ damned job before sundown,or I"ll ship you of to Military school with that go$ damned Finklestien sh/t kid, son of a bi*tch" Strother Martin said it best!

[jeffahart]

Living with the folks is not the issue. Being a big damned boob is the issue. Like this. This is what I always think of, in an entitled boob!

MA... THE MEATLOAF.... NOW!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1LZnwxpRmg



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