The Top 10 Things I Learned from a Frame-off Restoration

[Wgesnerjr]

I have always looked to do a frame off restoration. It looked so cool and exciting. To restore every part just the way you wanted or to address some sub-par manufacturing defect and make it better; was absolutely intriguing. That is until I actually did it. It was then that I discovered the things no one tells you about. Here is my top 10 things anyone should know before starting a frame off restoration.

10. The laws of physics: When you disassemble a car, the car’s foot print becomes 6 times bigger. Have lots of covered and dry space. Whatever you have, it’s not enough.

9. Practice of Medicine: If you do a frame off, medical things happen. Both good and bad. Just disassemble a car and watch. The dog will get gout or someone will get braces. Prime example: If you have infertility problems, disassemble a car to the point of no return. Works better than any pharmaceutical on the market. This is a guaranteed 100% way to get someone pregnant. Don’t believe me? How many car ads say “new baby on the way, need a family car”?

8. Ritualistic burial of the dead: Once that car is apart, everyone in the vicinity assumes it is dead will try to bury it. Things will materialize out of thin air. Boxes, bags, Holiday decorations. Your family will use it as shelving. Neighbors will bring unused items. If left unchecked long enough, the car will implode beneath the weight of the debris.

7. Gift of sight: Parts that look good enough to reuse won’t; the second they are placed near new paint. Surface rust is rarely just on the surface. Panels are never “dent-free”.

6. The Law of magnetic attraction: Under new paint is steel. Magnets are attracted to Steel. Here is a short list of things that are magnetic: gardening tools, belt buckles, bikes, rings, children, old men, birds, purses, wheel barrows, dogs, hail, rocks, cats, and garage doors. Even if the car is NOT steel, somehow it will attract these things.

5. Genetic reproduction: Nothing in a catalog fits like it should, feels like it should or is in the correct color. No matter how good science gets, these things can NEVER be cloned or replicated without some level of mutation.

4. Science of Evolution: No matter how hard you try to stay organized, you will wind up losing parts. Just like primordial organisms, things just grow feet and walk away in the middle of the night. These parts are usually made of “Unobtainium”. Replacements or an NOS one on eBay will cost you a house payment.

3. Pestilence: The UPS, FedEx, and Postal carriers avoid your house like the plague. You will have more boxes than garbage cans in front of your house on garbage night. Your neighbors will publically shun you as a hoarder and a tree killer, then privately buy stock in cardboard suppliers.

2. Valuation: Size does not coincide with cost. How can sun visor screws cost $1.95 a piece??? Really!?! The size of the box rarely dictates the size of the product. A 2 foot by 2 foot box may contain just one decal.

1. Law of Addiction: Once you are half way through the project, you swear off another full restoration. But before the last screw is tightened, the search history on your computer will have nothing but craigslist ads and eBay watches.

[truckster]

That's a good list. There's an additional one I experienced: The time dilation paradox. The closer you think you're getting, the further away from being done you are.

[Steeveedee]

Originally Posted by truckster

That's a good list. There's an additional one I experienced: The time dilation paradox. The closer you think you're getting, the further away from being done you are.

That phenomenon actually has a name- the 80/20 Rule. 80% of the work will get done in 20% of the allotted time. Then the remaining 20% will take 80% of the allotted time. Note that I said, "Allotted", because there is, as we used to say, going to be a slip in the schedule, for all the reasons Wgesnerjr mentioned.

I'm looking at getting an old stepside. I'm going to have to get my wife used to the sticker shock, because I am NOT, at the age of 67, looking to do more than maintenance. Some of the prices I see on line are Barrett-Jackson crazy. There's a derelict ~'47 Chevy truck not to far from me that 20 years ago should have been hauled away as scrap. The seller is asking $9800, and it needs everything.

[Ol Blue K20]

Great analogy! That's why my truck stays multi colored. I can drive as I go....lol

[Axle]

Originally Posted by Wgesnerjr

[I]
10. The laws of physics: When you disassemble a car, the car’s foot print becomes 6 times bigger. Have lots of covered and dry space. Whatever you have, it’s not enough.

Personally, this is my no.1.

And a number 11 for me; there will come a point where it seems like time stands still even when you are working on it every night as you work on the normally "hidden" things, so it looks like no progress is actually being made when you stand back and look at it.

[burnin oil]

My life is like #11. Every once in awhile I bump a lower priority project to the top to keep from being overwhelmed. Sometimes though you just have to bite it and suffer through though and eventually something really big comes off the list. As far as trucks go this is a hobby to most on here and we need to remember that. There are aspects we don't like but if you can't enjoy ot overall its time to find another hobby. I despise bodywork but I enjoy being able to say that I did it all and I get to look at it each day when I walk out of the house.

[68bowtie]

This stuff is all so true. My project is no where near a restoration and most of these apply. I can’t imagine doing a frame off ever.

[flashed]

Boy , this is so true . Im am bad about buying too many projects before I can even get started on my first one . I just sold a 67 project truck this morning that will free up space for my current project . I do buy and sell trucks and parts though so its a never ending cycle . I just need to not fall in Love with any more projects and just simply buy them to resale . I cant keep them all.

[mark 68]

I’m going through all of this. And what makes it even better is the tool black hole. No matter how you try that one import tool disappears. Who has specific trails through the garage or has to reorganize debris to work on a new section.
Posted via Mobile Device

[The Rocknrod]

Yes it's definitely for the committed, there are so many "projects" out there that will never be finished.

[Wgesnerjr]

Originally Posted by mark 68

I’m going through all of this. And what makes it even better is the tool black hole. No matter how you try that one import tool disappears. Who has specific trails through the garage or has to reorganize debris to work on a new section.
Posted via Mobile Device

During my build, I had so much "truck" everywhere that I could no longer keep the lawmowers in the garage. They got "relocated" to under the back porch. The paths I had were so small that sometimes you had to walk sideways to get through. Once my wife ripped her pants on some stray metal and that caused the Great Basement Clean Up of 2016. It was a day no one in the house will forget. The fighting, the yelling, the gnashing of teeth. Somehow were are still happily married.

Also, before body work, the bed sat in my side yard on sawhorses to save inside space. It turned into a scrap parts bin before I was done.

[70STOVEBOLT]

Originally Posted by mark 68

I’m going through all of this. And what makes it even better is the tool black hole. No matter how you try that one import tool disappears. Who has specific trails through the garage or has to reorganize debris to work on a new section.
Posted via Mobile Device

I do.

[truckster]

Originally Posted by Wgesnerjr

During my build, I had so much "truck" everywhere that I could no longer keep the lawmowers in the garage. They got "relocated" to under the back porch. The paths I had were so small that sometimes you had to walk sideways to get through. Once my wife ripped her pants on some stray metal and that caused the Great Basement Clean Up of 2016. It was a day no one in the house will forget. The fighting, the yelling, the gnashing of teeth. Somehow were are still happily married.

Also, before body work, the bed sat in my side yard on sawhorses to save inside space. It turned into a scrap parts bin before I was done.

I built a shed to house the tools I wasn't using to work on my Blazer.

Now that I'm driving it, it was all worth the effort.

[Palf70Step]

For Sure, especially 10, 4, & 1.

[LT7A]

Well done. I enjoyed this. Humor + warning!

[Wgesnerjr]

Yes, I tried to keep my humor during the entire process. Otherwise I wouldn't have made it.

I keep trying to tell my nephew that I made my frame off look easier than it really was. He still wants to restore a second gen Firebird after all my warnings.

I know he will take it apart and never put it back together again.

[FleetsidePaul]

That's the reason that I never restored my truck. I like to drive it. I know if I tore it apart it would never get put back together.

Now I have the 50 Packard on the way. I'm just going to get it up and running and drive it. Which should take twice as long and cost about twice as much as I expect.

I don't need pretty. You should see some of the women I've woken up with.

[Black_Sheep]

I’ve done a few down to the last nut and bolt builds, my biggest take away is that it will cost twice as much and take three times longer than expected.

The OP makes a lot of valid observations, their point about how much space is required is so true. When I built my Plymouth in a 2 car garage I literally had parts stashed throughout the house. My bride was not very happy about it...

[Klas]

I've done many body off restorations on Corvettes and most recently my wife's '61 C10. What I've can't figure out is how these car shows do a whole project in one hour!!!!!!!!!! LOL

[LS short box]

Maybe adding one more?

Buying a project that just has a little rust. Typically it means a little rust every where.

[joedoh]

here is a hot take on the 80/20. i usually buy the next project when I am 80% done with the current one. my excitement to get started on the next one makes the last 20% go faster.

[The Rocknrod]

Nuts and bolts grow legs when dropped.