Post your keep up with Richard funnies

[special-K]

I don't have the jokes like Richard. I'm an on the spot humorist. I see and I say. Now wasn't that funny??? I'm just popping up silly stuff I find that makes you smile or chuckle... hopefully

Fashion... First there were droopy drawers and now this?

[Boog]

It don’t happen often Tim but here I am speechless.

[Getter-Done]

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Hey Tim







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[Palf70Step]

[richard2717]

This is what we who are aged 70 or 80 years plus, might have to look forward to.

This is something that happened at an assisted living center.

The people who lived there had small apartments, but they all ate at a central cafeteria.

One morning one of the residents didn't show up for breakfast so my wife went upstairs and knocked on his door to see if everything was OK.

She could hear him through the door and he said that he was running late and would be down shortly, so she went back to the dining area.

An hour later he still hadn't arrived, so she went back up towards his room, but found him on the stairs.

He was coming down the stairs but was having a hard time.

He had a death grip on the handrail and seemed to have trouble getting his legs to work right.

She told him she was going to call an ambulance, but he told her no, he wasn't in any pain and just wanted to have his breakfast.

So, she helped him the rest of the way down the stairs and he had his
breakfast.

When he tried to return to his room, he was completely unable to get up even the first stair step, so they called an ambulance for him.

A couple of hours later she called the hospital to see how he was doing.

The receptionist there said he was fine, he just had both of his legs in one side of his boxer shorts.

I'm sending this to my children so that they don't sell the house before they know all the facts.

[Stocker]

Richard, I would at that one..... but at age 70 and climbing, I'm not sure how funny it really is.

[Getter-Done]

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[special-K]

Oh man, that was fun-EE!

[FleetsidePaul]

[FleetsidePaul]

[special-K]

That's one more than my family Five sisters and one brother

[FleetsidePaul]

Originally Posted by special-K

That's one more than my family Five sisters and one brother

A friend of mine has 15 kids. All grown now.
He was telling me that his daughter asked him to babysit.
His response....F-No! I've had enough of that SH**!!

[68bowtie]

Originally Posted by FleetsidePaul

I grew up with 8 siblings (1 more kid than that family), but we couldn’t afford fancy stickers like that. Half my siblings were adopted too, so not exactly the same situation!

[1976gmc20]

Do they make some horse stickers?

Also, some deer and turkey stickers since they raid our barn

[72c20customcamper]

123b

[special-K]

(*)(*)

[Killer Bee]

[FleetsidePaul]

[special-K]

Sheesh, they coulda listed it in proper order.

and I better get this moving along now....

Gotta go. My gal sent a message, needs picked up from work. I just dropped her off! Sheesh! Now I gotta deal with this

[richard2717]

...

[richard2717]

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.

[special-K]

They can tell you more than you want to know alright

[3757chevy]

When Grandma Goes To Court - Funny cartoon -...

LMAO

[special-K]

Old Grandpa went in to the lumber yard to get some materials to build a new wood shed. The clerk asks how he can help and grandpa answers, "I need fifty 2 x 4s for wall studs". The younger clerk rolls his eyes a bit before asking, "Well, Pops, can you tell me how long you'll be needing those 2 x 4s?", as if speaking to a child. Gramps looks at the young man with a questioned look and answers quite firmly, "A long time, young man, I'll be using them to build a wood shed!"

[richard2717]

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