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-   -   Joke Thread (https://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/showthread.php?t=805197)

Getter-Done 01-13-2024 01:07 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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special-K 01-13-2024 01:11 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
That's right. Only stupid if it didn't work and plum lucky when it did. Cool truck. I'd do what I could to make that happen

special-K 01-13-2024 01:29 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Getter-Done (Post 9275720)
And FS is (For Sure) right? :lol:

I thought it meant Fat Sh!t :jdp:

Shifty One 01-13-2024 01:31 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Getter-Done (Post 9276143)

Seems legit...

special-K 01-13-2024 01:41 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kwmech (Post 9276136)
This reminds of a scene in the series MASH when Alan Alda does a couple of sentences using nothing but Acronyms

me and a guy who worked for me in the '80s would go on like that. It all started when I first saw a Toyota MR2. I'd say 'MR2?" and he'd answer SAR, then go on from there with TLAs that sound like three words, like BOK

I worked on a woman's place who was an editor of some paper. She used FYI constantly. That's one you can throw in front or in the middle of most anything you say, front, middle, or back. It was very annoying, FYI. Old Blu 80 lived next door and I asked him if there were any FYI addiction treatment centers nearby :lol:

richard2717 01-13-2024 06:54 PM

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nana

HO455 01-13-2024 07:07 PM

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Getter-Done (Post 9276143)

Another person confused about the definitions of lucky and intelligent.

Getter-Done 01-13-2024 09:17 PM

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Getter-Done 01-14-2024 12:03 PM

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richard2717 01-15-2024 08:04 AM

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Last week, my neighbor asked me, "seeing that our houses have the same floor plan and square footage, can I ask how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy to do your family room?"
"Thirteen," I replied.
Today, he came over looking upset and said, "I've got three rolls of wallpaper left over!"
"So did I" I replied!

Boog 01-15-2024 09:23 AM

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^^^^^ :lol:

richard2717 01-15-2024 11:11 AM

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richard2717 01-15-2024 01:13 PM

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richard2717 01-15-2024 01:26 PM

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"Your Girl is worried about you talking to Kayla on Snapchat. My Wife is worried I'm talking to Leon on Facebook Marketplace about a '71 Chevy Cheyenne Truck that 'ran when parked' and just needs floor pans. We are not the same."


.

HO455 01-16-2024 12:38 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9276828)
"Your Girl is worried about you talking to Kayla on Snapchat. My Wife is worried I'm talking to Leon on Facebook Marketplace about a '71 Chevy Cheyenne Truck that 'ran when parked' and just needs floor pans. We are not the same."


.

Wait! Leon's got his Cheyenne for sale????
How did I miss that?

special-K 01-16-2024 06:57 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9276744)
Last week, my neighbor asked me, "seeing that our houses have the same floor plan and square footage, can I ask how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy to do your family room?"
"Thirteen," I replied.
Today, he came over looking upset and said, "I've got three rolls of wallpaper left over!"
"So did I" I replied!

:lol::lol::lol: My kind of humor :lol:

richard2717 01-16-2024 08:19 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Bagpipes at a Funeral
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.
I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. Played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept. We all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently I'm still lost.... it's a man thing.

Getter-Done 01-16-2024 10:06 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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I was a Cowboys fan in the 80's
So this would be about right??

Attachment 2328652

richard2717 01-16-2024 10:17 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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due

Boog 01-16-2024 10:37 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9277027)
Bagpipes at a Funeral
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.
I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. Played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept. We all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently I'm still lost.... it's a man thing.

smiff. That was bee you tee full.

Boog 01-16-2024 10:40 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Art and cheer leaders. ummm um. ;)

Getter-Done 01-16-2024 11:29 AM

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richard2717 01-16-2024 09:24 PM

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no snitch

richard2717 01-20-2024 01:09 PM

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procharge

Getter-Done 01-20-2024 10:56 PM

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richard2717 01-21-2024 10:33 AM

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A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she’d like as a gift. “I’d like to be 6 again,” she replied, still looking in the mirror.
On the morning of her birthday, he rose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.
Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald’s where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a Disney movie, with popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&Ms. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, exhausted.
He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, "Well dear, what was it like being 6 again?"
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.
"I meant my dress size, you idiot!!!!"
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong.

richard2717 01-21-2024 11:47 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
I helped my neighbour out this morning and she said , I could marry you , I couldn’t believe it you do something nice for someone and they threaten to ruin your life !

CG 01-21-2024 01:39 PM

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Getter-Done 01-21-2024 05:00 PM

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CG 01-21-2024 06:30 PM

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Steeveedee 01-21-2024 06:31 PM

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:lol: So true!

richard2717 01-23-2024 01:01 PM

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spider

3757chevy 01-23-2024 03:02 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9279381)
spider

"Out of sight ,Out of mind" doesn't work with spiders.

CG 01-23-2024 06:09 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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richard2717 01-25-2024 08:06 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Crossed a whole bunch of things off of my to-do list today. Didn't do any of them just got tired of looking at them.

Boog 01-25-2024 09:43 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1. You made a list.
2. You crossed some things off.

Man, that's some progress right there! ;)

truckster 01-25-2024 10:32 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
I thought about making a list. I need to stop procrastinating...

I'll do it tomorrow.

richard2717 01-26-2024 12:32 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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my new scanner arrived


.

CG 01-26-2024 02:03 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
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:metal:

Boog 01-26-2024 05:13 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Tip of the day:

Don't fry bacon, naked.


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