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-   -   Joke Thread (https://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/showthread.php?t=805197)

3757chevy 02-20-2024 05:01 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
...

truckster 02-20-2024 09:28 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
I knew what it was without the second frame. Marvin has always been a favorite of mine.

3757chevy 02-20-2024 09:48 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by truckster (Post 9289321)
I knew what it was without the second frame. Marvin has always been a favorite of mine.

Mine too!

Steeveedee 02-20-2024 10:26 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
I'm waiting for life to be discovered on Mars, and finding out that the Martians are filing a grievance with a court on Earth about all the damage and litter we've left. As Marvin says, "You are making me very angry...very angry, indeed!" :D

68bowtie 02-21-2024 02:09 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9289197)
This is getting ridiculous. 1st they want me to report my truck part sales and now this???

.

There’s no way that’s real. It’s federal not California. :lol:

my56chevytruck 02-21-2024 10:16 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by truckster (Post 9283437)
George hasn't been feeling well lately, so he goes to the doctor.

"Doc, I just don't feel like my old self. I get out of breath easily, I have a hard time climbing the stairs, and I can't keep up the way I used to."

The doc says, "Well, George, I could run a lot of expensive tests, but it's really not necessary. I can tell you what's wrong. Your body mass index is excessive. You need to lose at least 50 pounds. In short, you've let yourself get fat."

George is indignant. "Well! Of all the nerve. I think I want a second opinion."

"OK," the doc says, "you're ugly too."

Stop george while your a HEAD!

Getter-Done 02-24-2024 01:19 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
Attachment 2339393

Boog 02-24-2024 01:31 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
^^^ :lol: No need to be piling on.

richard2717 02-27-2024 11:19 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories.
There were all the regular types of stuff: Spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only Janie was left.
"Janie, do you have a story to share?"
'Yes ma'am. My daddy told me a story about my Mommy. She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break, and then she parachuted right into the middle of 20 Iraqi troops. She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands."
''Good Heavens, 'said the horrified teacher. What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story'?"
"Don't mess with Mommy when she's been drinking."
I love these touching stories!

richard2717 02-27-2024 11:19 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
carp

Getter-Done 02-28-2024 12:10 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9291252)
carp

If I remember correctly,

You lay the Carp on a Board in the Back yard.

Leave it for a few days.

Bury the Carp .

Then Eat the Board. :lol::bann::haha::rolleyes::bann::clap:

68bowtie 02-28-2024 12:28 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
No joke I cooked a carp up nice once, lots of butter and seasonings. I’ll eat about anything. But I could NOT eat that. Not an exaggeration to say it tasted like mud…

truckster 02-28-2024 02:31 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
My all-purpose fish recipe: Take the fish and put in in a blender. Puree and add water. Use the mixture to fertilize grass. Use the grass to feed beef. Eat the beef.

richard2717 03-01-2024 03:13 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
knit

Boog 03-01-2024 03:49 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Fishnet stockings. Oh my..

richard2717 03-01-2024 06:09 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
party

Shifty One 03-01-2024 06:33 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
:spittake:

richard2717 03-06-2024 01:05 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
hat

my56chevytruck 03-06-2024 01:39 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by 68bowtie (Post 9291467)
No joke I cooked a carp up nice once, lots of butter and seasonings. I’ll eat about anything. But I could NOT eat that. Not an exaggeration to say it tasted like mud…

when i fished with my dad if we caught a carp he'd damn near cut the line to get that bottom feeder off, haha

truckster 03-06-2024 01:51 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by my56chevytruck (Post 9293660)
when i fished with my dad if we caught a carp he'd damn near cut the line to get that bottom feeder off, haha

When I was in Iraq we trained the Iraqi highway patrol. They invited us to a special feast - carp caught in the Euphrates River, which is an open sewer by the time it reaches the area I was serving in. As a matter of principle and taste, I don't eat fish, but everyone who did had nasty stuff violently exiting both ends of the digestive tract for the next 48 hours.

richard2717 03-06-2024 02:00 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
bee

Boog 03-06-2024 02:37 PM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by truckster (Post 9293666)
When I was in Iraq we trained the Iraqi highway patrol. They invited us to a special feast - carp caught in the Euphrates River, which is an open sewer by the time it reaches the area I was serving in. As a matter of principle and taste, I don't eat fish, but everyone who did had nasty stuff violently exiting both ends of the digestive tract for the next 48 hours.

And you know those Iraqis were laughing their ashes off, right? :lol:

richard2717 03-08-2024 10:39 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
1 Attachment(s)
tip

Keith Seymore 03-08-2024 10:43 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
Isn't a catfish a carp with a moustache?

Catfish is a delicacy where my people come from.

K

Keith Seymore 03-08-2024 10:44 AM

Re: Joke Thread
 
2 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717 (Post 9293672)
bee

In related news: it looks like our bees made it through the winter. First time for us, in about 5 years of trying.

I am OK with calling myself a "beekeeper" now!

K


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